15 August 2016

dirty word dowry

Dowry - as know as jahez in our community - is actually a BLOODY DISEASE WE HAVEN'T GOTTEN RID OFF. You see, it really pisses me off.

Dowry is basically all the stuff a bride's family give her (electronics, gold furniture, sometimes property etc) This tradition started as the parents giving their daughters all of the things as "gifts" but then it started to turn out horrible. Groom's family started demanding things they wanted from bride's family. Traditions, ta-da. People would do anything to give their daughters a glorious dowry so that her in-laws would be pleased and their daughter would live in peace and harmony. But now, it's a bloody disease. Many young women can't even get married because their parents can't afford a good amount of dowry. And it's not just a story, I've seen it happen. I've seen women who can't get married because they didn't have enough to pay to the family she was going to marry into. I have seen women being divorced because 1) the dowry wasn't nice 2) her husband found someone who could afford a better dowry.


We already have raised horrible sons and vulnerable daughters to accept dowry as it is. You see, it's totally normal for people to talk about someone's dowry like it's totally normal:

Did you see how awful dowry Mrs. XYZ's daughter in law brought? Not even a fridge in it!

My daughter-in-law should bring an air conditioner with her, at least.

It's time to fix it.

You're not supposed to spend everything you've earned on a wedding when it can also be a simple event. There's no sense in spending thousands of rupees on one single event that would last for 3 hours & inviting people you don't even know or like. And absolutely not right to sell your son by asking things from bride's family that you can afford by yourself or you already have. Or tricking yourself into thinking that giving a huge amount of dowry can buy happiness for your daughter. It's not going to happen. 

Traditions are good as long as they're not hurting you but when they're poisonous, we can always walk away from them. I asked on my tumblr to tell me what others think of dowry and the result turned out amazing. I'm v happy to see that the younger generation thinks way better than the previous one when it comes to dowry.

A woman's worth more than her money

We don't want to buy our grooms

We're here and we're removing the price tag from our existence 

This one's my personal fave

I also wrote a lil poem and read it in front of god knows many people. I mean, I posted a video about it online. 

What do YOU think about dowry?

This post is in association with Orient Pakistan. People at Orient were kind enough to bring the dowry issue up and teach this world a good thing or two. Thanks a lot, Orient. The tvc that brought a little revolution online is attached down below:

(If you don't understand Urdu, please let me know and I will translate it for you)


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