24 October 2015

Everything that ruined me emotionally

The trouble that I find with dealing with emotions, like a grown up person, is that they drive me crazy. Like very bad kind of crazy. I'd rather read a book and cry on the death of my favorite character than dealing with them but you know, this isn't how you live your life. You gotta do what you gotta do. So, you talk to yourself and make things easy. This is what life does to you when you grow up. Ta da.

Last last last month, I came across the reality that I made a few life decisions and they suck. This was motivating enough to roll up myself into my bed and sleep for weeks and regret everything in life. But obviously, I needed to eat and live online. So I didn't sleep for weeks and I drew a lot and turned my regrets into art. This is pretty much everything that kept me going. Art keeps you alive, I told you all once.

Also, my bad decisions included keeping myself at a distance from a few human beings who used to be the most important part of my life but accidentally threw me out of their lives. Well, I didn't stay away. Plus, I just revealed my imaginary love life to that one particular human being because I like doing that, I've always liked doing that, telling her everything about my life/crushes/imaginary life/online adventures. So, staying away and maintaining my (almost) imaginary grace was another failure. 

I realized my most favorite tv show is still months away. Teen wolf won't be coming back till 2016 god knows in which month and god knows if Derek Hale would make big entrance and only god knows how long I'm going to wait alive.

I also just realized that this post has been written in a vvvv low self esteem vibe. Don't worry, I'm okay. I'll be posting a glorious make up post soon and planning big things in life ft failures ft good books ft good human beings too. I hope you all are doing great.


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1 comment:

  1. Hey girl, you're entitled to one post like that! It's life. As long as you keep on being you my dear!

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