27 April 2016

Words from books I'll never write pt2

I have a notebook which I use solely for writings. Good or bad, everything goes in there. Last month I gave it a wanderlust inspired cover but it's not just about wanderlust. It's all about what's going inside my head. And I've decided to share some of my writings again.

The first time I wrote a post like this, it was like:
Dear readers, this blog is my safe heaven where I can try things, fail things, not-fail things and succeed a little, be happy, create content that makes a difference. So I'm trying one more thing here, I'm trying to write more, imagine more, be a little more than what I already am. So, this is a new post series, will be posted weekly/monthly/whenever I'm done writing something. I am not good at sketching characters or writing anything at all that makes perfect sense but look I'm trying. This post series is a sign of trying. These are incomplete, improper & totally raw scenes from my mind that I want you all to read. Let's give it a go and stay with me.

Finally, this thing has a second edition.

"I kept staring the the window. It was morning outside. I am grateful for the white curtains in my room. They're one a few finest things I could afford. The room lacks fine things. I look at the fine white walls and they stare back at me. I feel like they're complaining, asking me to get out and replace myself with a fine girl who knows what life is, where to place a mirror in this room, what colored bed sheet would go with these walls and bed, things like that etc. I try to tell them that I'm not the girl who would make these white walls a better shade of white. They don't listen to me. I want to tell them that white scares me and I hope one day I wake up and find the whiteness gone. I don't care what the color of these walls would turn into but let it be not white, some shades of blue would work, like a sky in front of me, but for god's sake no white. White is not peace and it's not divine, white is emptiness and absence of everything that I've ever wanted to feel."
-Woman NOT in white


"I had thought he'd be ugly, maybe with some broken bones, a burning heart I could see, nose too long, all dressed in black, stepping into the room directly from hell. But he wasn't like that at all. He was young, attractive and all dressed in teal. I had realized he was made up of everything that embarrassed me. Remember grade 9 when I liked a guy and named him after teal color which was my favorite back then, the color comes from there. And attractive men annoy me for no particular reason.

 When I first met him, I expected him to laugh at me and talk in a way like villains do. But he sat in front of me and did the one thing that kills me, he didn't even look at me. THE BITCH WAS IGNORING ME. When he finally talked, he asked me about the paper I almost failed and even the talk of it gives me panic attacks. He clearly knew that I can't recall the memory without losing my senses at least once or twice. He's a dark creature for a reason, I thought. I never knew I was home to such darkness. I made tea, obviously for him, and coffee for me. I had a feeling that he liked everything I hated. Obviously, he was my very own demon, coming to meet me for our monthly meetings, ignoring me and drinking tea in my drawing room."
-Demon of my own

 GOD I LOVE WRITING SO MUCH. I know the writings are wicked and I'm not a "real writer" but I love to write and that's what this blog is all about. 


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25 April 2016

a dead & glorious city || photo diary of #instameetThatta

The district of Thatta is full of dead people and historical places. Shrines, mosques and old buildings are its speciality. When Instgaram announced its official instameet dates, me and my squad planned another trip to the heart of this dead and glorious city. Instameets are basically what you call an adventure with internet people. People from instagram gather together, talk and take pictures. We did one last year as well (plus I've practically spent a big part of my life in the district) so it was more like home.

It started with a road trip from Karachi to Keenjhar lake, then a boat ride to Noori Jam Tamachi's shrine. Her shrine is actually in the middle of the lake. You gotta take a boat to reach there. 

 Noori was a fisherwoman who became the wife of Jam Tamachi who was the ruler of Thatta. He fell in love with her. She's buried there along with a famous Saint Shah Hondro. Noori & Jam Tamachi are a part of Shah Jo Risalo who is one of the most famous Sindhi books, based on 7 romantic tales. It's the only story that didn't end tragically, I mean it was tragic that Noori was poisoned in the end by some hater but at least she got to marry Jam Tamachi.

And no, my twin sister is not named after her. Though her nick is Noori.

 At the shrine, I tried convincing everyone that I look like a piece of art + highly instagrammable so they should take a photo of me. It's mainly because my outfit was on point and it made me utterly happy. Jadirah took this photo, THANKS BBY!

I took my art journal with me so that I could make some art about the instameet. The theme given by Instagram was Earth Day. Making art by the shore of Keenjhar lake was the last thing I had imagined but it really happened. 


We were at a dhaba for the food. HERE'S TO MY CREATIVE WOMEN! 

Then comes the glorious graveyard of Makli. The heart of famous dead people, king and queens. 

 The people.

 Me & Jadirah.

It was not just an instameet for photographs but a way to deal with my wanderlust. I was an excited kid with too many things to see, discover and talk about. I live for days like this when I don't have to be myself, explain things or make sense out of anything but just to see what's out thee in this world. And I LOVED each moment of it.

You can read Jadirah's post of our trip here.

Have you ever been to an instameet?


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21 April 2016

If Halsey had South Asian parents - a photo diary

 What actually happened is a good wedding season & a new hair cut. And the cap I'm wearing is almost stolen from an uncle who doesn't mind if he loses anything (which is more irresponsible of him but it's working well for me) And the there's me, inspired by Halsey's usual style (the hair, the cap, the attitude ta da) and appreciating her existence because she has taken over 40% of my playlist and maybe it's the best thing that happened after a long while to my music collection. There's something about her that touches my heart, maybe it's her recklessness or the way she romanticize things which I cannot. I have hard times romanticising things/persons/weather.

This blog post is supposed to be a photo diary of what will happen if Halsey had South Asian parents, forcing her into getting a rishta (marriage proposal)  

Be proud of me, Halsey.

PS: My first Youtube experience was BOMB and I'm so motivated + excited to do more videos. It's funny how I was always afraid to do it and suddenly it's been done and I have a channel and my family members have become more supportive of it than they ever were of this blog. 

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19 April 2016

Lipstick Talk + A MINI VLAAAHG

If I could talk to my younger self right now, I'd ask her: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T HANDLE LIPSTICKS? 

Well, hey there, I have a mini vlog embedded at the end of the post and there's a youtube channel you can subscribe now and there are lipstick shades I want to talk about. I had thought I'd never find a place in make up for me but thank goodness I was wrong. Though I still know nothing of make up but I think I like lipsticks way too much. Dark, bold, deadly lipsticks. Or nude or lightest shades. There's nothing in between. My current top 3 shades are my life right now and I had to let the world know about it. 

So, TA-DA! Here comes 2 minute and few seconds of me talking about my most favorite lipsticks. It includes deadly maroon, perfect purple and my most favorite unknown shade. 


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12 April 2016

so sad today || illustrations

So sad today has to be my MOST favorite twitter account ever. It's a raw showcase of feelings. The tweets might feel empty, pathetic and dark sometimes but they're mostly what many of us want to say most of the time. And trust me, a lot of them would be the best replies to some really weird situations but obviously we can't casually use them. They'll get us into straight trouble. 

Here are 2 of my fave tweets from this week. 
There's so much happening in my head: Internet, regrets, everything I am not able to do. What I don't need right now is a feeling that would make me poetic. And if you have enough emotions and feelings for yourself, stay away. 

 I followed my heart and now I'm in the middle of the sea, with my heart glasses on and everything looks around looks a weird mixture of violet and blue. There's too much wind and I'm stuck in water, not yet turned into a mermaid cause I still can feel my toes. The heart is a stupid stupid stupid thing.

 It's a quick post for my appreciation for so sad today. BOTH SCENES ARE IMAGINARY AND ARE DIRECTLY FROM MY HEAD XOXO

Do you have a fave twitter account?


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